A Life Well Lived
Recently, I lost a dear family member, and while I do not often share personal stories publicly, something about her life compels me to share this story. Her journey intertwines life and work in a way that brings perspective on both.
Photo from my family’s hometown in Sovramonte, Italy. by Diane Steele
My aunt passed away just shy of her 99th birthday. Had it not been for a tragic fall, she would have lived longer, perhaps a centurian, but the point I want to make transcends this.
She came from a humble Italian immigrant family who had nothing but their hands, their work, and a fierce determination to survive. They sowed their food, worked tirelessly, and made do with what they had. Like many immigrants, they spoke their native language and navigated the complexities of American culture with resilience.
Life was hard for them. The farmhouse was cold in the winter and hot in the summer, with no extras or frills. The children had only one special Sunday outfit to wear to church each week. However, they were always clean and well-maintained, with a distinct Italian style.
When my aunt left home after high school, she had nothing but a small suitcase of her belongings and the dreams in her heart. So, how does someone raised with so little live to be a nearly 99-year-old woman? And what does this have to do with career and work?
It’s simple: life and work are inseparable. How we live determines how we work, and how we work shapes how we live. I am not just talking about how much you can afford to live, but rather the deeper meaning of living fully.
My aunt had nothing in material wealth, but she had LIFE, an abundant, long life. She was never sick, never had surgery, never took medication outside of a daily vitamin, nor relied on anyone. After her husband passed, she lived alone in her rural home for 40 years, yes, she married the milkman, a story all on its own.
So, what did she have that kept her thriving well into her 90s?
Faith: She was deeply connected to her community and her faith. Not just an attendee, but an active participant, volunteering and offering her time and knowledge. She spent countless hours in community kitchens, sharing recipes and lending a hand.
Guts: She was not afraid to try new things. In her 30s, this country girl joined a women’s golf league, later winning tournaments. She proudly displayed her trophies in her modest home.
Ingenuity: She did not need gadgets or the latest technology to thrive. When she received a microwave as a gift, she tossed it out the kitchen door because it “caused cancer” and never looked back. She made do with what worked, her stove. She used a knife and hammer to open a watermelon at 92, and a screwdriver to open a bottle of wine. She didn’t see the need for fancy tools.
She laughed daily, shared jokes, and always had a smile on her face. She never spoke ill of anyone, and there was always an open seat at her table.
She never touched sugar. Only the kids got to indulge in that. She ate real, scratch-made food: meats, potatoes, and of course, pasta and a glass of vino. Anything with ingredients she could not pronounce, she would not buy. Protein shakes I once bought her found a new home, next to the microwave.
She was fiercely independent. She did not accept freebies, and if she needed something, she figured out how to get it herself, or she went without.
She lived within her means.
She worked jobs that made her happy. Her favorite was at a greenhouse where she tended to flowers and vegetables. People would travel miles just to speak with her, this humble woman working for minimum wage, offering the best advice with a smile and a laugh.
She took care of her business. I remember her planning her funeral 5 years before she passed. She not only planned it but paid for it, including lunch for 200 people.
She spoke the truth, not to hurt but to be factual. She loved unconditionally and never held a grudge.
So, what does this have to do with work, career, or life today? We all have a finite time on this earth, and too often, we tie our identity to our work. We chase money, recognition, the corporate ladder, and titles, but for what purpose?
Are we living a well-rounded life, balanced by health, love, laughter, and growth? Or is our work keeping us from living fully? Are we brave enough to make hard decisions and speak truths, even if they’re uncomfortable?
My aunt did not have “goals” in the traditional sense. She did not live for a result, an amount in the bank, or a title. She lived with purpose each day, just enjoying life, letting it unfold as it would. And in the end, she had a long, rich life, a life well-lived.
As you step back and review your goals for the upcoming months or years, what is it that will help you live a life well-lived, hopefully into your 90s. How is your career or current job supporting or hindering? Hopefully, everything is in alignment. But if not, the time is now to take action.
We can only hope to live as she did, unapologetically, authentically, and full of joy, no matter what comes our way.
““A life well lived is not measured by what we accumulate, but by the people we touch and the good we do.”
